So, yeah...the big news? I just celebrated THE Big Four-Oh.
That's right...as of 9:30 am yesterday, I officially completed forty years of my life. I know somewhere in here, I'm supposed to start worrying about a mid-life crisis...but I still feel like life has just really been getting started for me. Every time I feel like life has finally pulled all the strings together and I've arrived at where I was intended to be, some new door opens up and I realize that, for all the preparations that have already taken place in life, I'm still learning and becoming who I'm intended to be.
I did have to laugh about my birthday this year. Last year, I went to a lot of trouble to try and set up a big birthday weekend...I had dinner with friends scheduled one night, was hoping to spend the next night playing some games with more friends, and was going to wrap up the weekend with a family dinner. The first night held true to plan...and everything else on the weekend kind of went off somewhere into left field (I had another dinner, for someone else's birthday, the second night, and most of my family was ill so I ended up having a modest birthday dinner with my younger brother and his kids...fun in its own right, but not quite what I'd planned...)
This year, I hadn't made any plans, at all. Well, that's not entirely true...I told myself about a year and a half ago that I wanted to go to Vegas and see Blue Man Group perform to celebrate my 40th birthday. That hasn't been an option yet, though I still haven't crossed it off the list. But aside from that, I had no plans. And for some reason, I've had people appearing out of the woodwork...people I haven't seen or heard from in years...that have managed to find me just in time to wish me happy birthday this year.
Another reason I didn't plan anything was because someone had already (kind of) made plans for me. Some friends of mine have started a performing group in Salt Lake (the Voodoo Darlings--a burlesque troupe), and asked me to help them with costumes. They had a show last night...so, as has happened many times in the past, I was working on my birthday...kind of. But I've never had 200+ people sing Happy Birthday to me before--they pulled me up on stage in the middle of the show to have the whole audience sing to me. It was a novel experience...and it also reminded me how much I miss being on stage in front of an audience...something I haven't done more than a handful of times since I stopped attending college. I'm hoping to do something about that...I've got to see if there's enough flexibility in my work schedule for me to do it, but a new friend of mine is directing A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, which is one of the few musicals that I truly enjoy (as opposed to bemusedly tolerating, which is my usual reaction to musicals)--and when I told him I was interested in being on stage, but didn't feel my singing was strong enough, he mentioned the character Erronius...I could have a lot of fun playing a dotty old man looking for his long-lost kids...
But we'll see if it happens. Personally, I consider the fact that I was willing to speak up and even offer to audition for a musical to be a big step...I just might have to figure out how to sing or something...*laugh*
I am still working at Lagoon, and I'm really looking forward to this season...we've hired a woman to be my assistant who's also had a lot of experience doing costumes for a park in Kansas City, so for the first time in a long time, I'm not going to be hesitant about the chaos that could erupt from me taking time away from the park. This is good, because I have more and more freelance offers coming my way...I just did a makeup job for a tech convention in Salt Lake, where they wanted people made up as characters from the World of Warcraft game. Everyone was very impressed with my work, and the event coordinator has already mentioned two additional projects he's got coming his way that he'd like to use me on. I've also got another set-painting project (not as big as Anne of Green Gables was, thank goodness...I spent a good part of the winter nursing a sore thumb from the stress put on my hand painting that much scenery that quickly, trying to hold onto large brushes that would cover the flats in a hurry...) And it seems like every time I think nothing else is going to be coming my way for a while, a new project opens up. Now, if I could just get my social life to keep pace with my professional life...
I do feel like I've kind of opened a new chapter in my life, in many ways. For the last several years, I've kind of felt like half of my life has still been in Logan, and I have told people several times over the years that if I felt like I could actually make a living in my career field there, I'd move back to Logan right away. But in the last year or so, I've felt more and more like it was time to stop looking back over my shoulder at what I had, and longing after it, and that it was time to start making the most of what I had where I was at, NOW. When I first moved south, Mom asked if it was going to be long-term. At the time, I really didn't know...I told her that if I felt like I could sustain a living in my career here, I'd stay. I think part of me has been operating with lingering doubts about that, and I've kind of feared committing to the move and then having things go wrong...but things have, essentially, only gotten more and more busy the longer I'm here. So, while I will always have strong ties to Logan, with family and many of my nearest and dearest friends there, I'm trying more and more to keep my eyes focused on where I am now, and where I'm going, and not so much on where I've been.
One of the reasons I have ties to Logan...well, Cache Valley, since she's not in Logan, is my mare, who's due to have another foal...well, basically, any day now. I could never afford to keep her down here...feed is more expensive, I'd have to pay pasture fees, and I'd have to carve yet another niche in my schedule to check up on her daily or else find someone I trusted to keep an eye on her for me. I can't imagine finding someone I trust more than Marla, who's taking care of Tot for me now...she and Ross are like another family to me, and even if there was no longer any Kidd family in the Logan area, I'd still feel like I had roots in the area. I'm hoping to have better luck with this foal than the last two...and I can only really consider it bad luck.
So...I'm another year older, though I don't feel it. My brother asked me if I felt like I was 40...most of the time, I still feel like I'm 25. There are days, though...there were a few times this winter when I was definitely feeling like I was getting older, but spending three hours a day (between the walks at my apartment complex and the walkways at work) will do that to you. I still credit feeling young to having a career that I love and working with people who also enjoy it as much as I do...I'm constantly discovering something new, learning a new trick or picking up a new skill or just getting to know a new performer that keeps me from getting caught up in the drudgery of doing the same thing, day after day. Apparently, this is translating well to my appearance...I have been working with Arika Shockmel on this show (she was the emcee), and she keeps telling me that I still look just the same as I did in college (even accused me of having my own Dorian Gray-style portrait stashed away somewhere...)
I keep meeting some truly unique and interesting people outside of work, too...I have to tell a story about one, in closing...after I'd finished the makeup work at the tech convention I talked about earlier, I had to meet someone about some costume work I was going to do for them. The theater they where they were rehearsing was only a few blocks from the venue where I'd been working...so I decided to walk, rather than having to deal with finding a parking place twice again that night. Along the way, I ran into a guy who gave me his hard-luck story...and while I'm not usually a soft touch for beggars, something about him rang true...I not only gave him some money, but ended up in a pretty lengthy discussion with him about life, faith, and dealing with the trials of life. The discussion ended with him unexpectedly saying a prayer aloud, and thanking God for meeting me...not for the money, but for the fact that I'd taken the time to talk...and to listen. And he asked that I be blessed that whatever I set my hand to would prosper. Regardless of your beliefs about God, it really struck home to me just how much we all need each other in this world, and about how little gestures we make can have such a huge impact for others. It was a very thought-provoking evening...
That's right...as of 9:30 am yesterday, I officially completed forty years of my life. I know somewhere in here, I'm supposed to start worrying about a mid-life crisis...but I still feel like life has just really been getting started for me. Every time I feel like life has finally pulled all the strings together and I've arrived at where I was intended to be, some new door opens up and I realize that, for all the preparations that have already taken place in life, I'm still learning and becoming who I'm intended to be.
I did have to laugh about my birthday this year. Last year, I went to a lot of trouble to try and set up a big birthday weekend...I had dinner with friends scheduled one night, was hoping to spend the next night playing some games with more friends, and was going to wrap up the weekend with a family dinner. The first night held true to plan...and everything else on the weekend kind of went off somewhere into left field (I had another dinner, for someone else's birthday, the second night, and most of my family was ill so I ended up having a modest birthday dinner with my younger brother and his kids...fun in its own right, but not quite what I'd planned...)
This year, I hadn't made any plans, at all. Well, that's not entirely true...I told myself about a year and a half ago that I wanted to go to Vegas and see Blue Man Group perform to celebrate my 40th birthday. That hasn't been an option yet, though I still haven't crossed it off the list. But aside from that, I had no plans. And for some reason, I've had people appearing out of the woodwork...people I haven't seen or heard from in years...that have managed to find me just in time to wish me happy birthday this year.
Another reason I didn't plan anything was because someone had already (kind of) made plans for me. Some friends of mine have started a performing group in Salt Lake (the Voodoo Darlings--a burlesque troupe), and asked me to help them with costumes. They had a show last night...so, as has happened many times in the past, I was working on my birthday...kind of. But I've never had 200+ people sing Happy Birthday to me before--they pulled me up on stage in the middle of the show to have the whole audience sing to me. It was a novel experience...and it also reminded me how much I miss being on stage in front of an audience...something I haven't done more than a handful of times since I stopped attending college. I'm hoping to do something about that...I've got to see if there's enough flexibility in my work schedule for me to do it, but a new friend of mine is directing A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, which is one of the few musicals that I truly enjoy (as opposed to bemusedly tolerating, which is my usual reaction to musicals)--and when I told him I was interested in being on stage, but didn't feel my singing was strong enough, he mentioned the character Erronius...I could have a lot of fun playing a dotty old man looking for his long-lost kids...
But we'll see if it happens. Personally, I consider the fact that I was willing to speak up and even offer to audition for a musical to be a big step...I just might have to figure out how to sing or something...*laugh*
I am still working at Lagoon, and I'm really looking forward to this season...we've hired a woman to be my assistant who's also had a lot of experience doing costumes for a park in Kansas City, so for the first time in a long time, I'm not going to be hesitant about the chaos that could erupt from me taking time away from the park. This is good, because I have more and more freelance offers coming my way...I just did a makeup job for a tech convention in Salt Lake, where they wanted people made up as characters from the World of Warcraft game. Everyone was very impressed with my work, and the event coordinator has already mentioned two additional projects he's got coming his way that he'd like to use me on. I've also got another set-painting project (not as big as Anne of Green Gables was, thank goodness...I spent a good part of the winter nursing a sore thumb from the stress put on my hand painting that much scenery that quickly, trying to hold onto large brushes that would cover the flats in a hurry...) And it seems like every time I think nothing else is going to be coming my way for a while, a new project opens up. Now, if I could just get my social life to keep pace with my professional life...
I do feel like I've kind of opened a new chapter in my life, in many ways. For the last several years, I've kind of felt like half of my life has still been in Logan, and I have told people several times over the years that if I felt like I could actually make a living in my career field there, I'd move back to Logan right away. But in the last year or so, I've felt more and more like it was time to stop looking back over my shoulder at what I had, and longing after it, and that it was time to start making the most of what I had where I was at, NOW. When I first moved south, Mom asked if it was going to be long-term. At the time, I really didn't know...I told her that if I felt like I could sustain a living in my career here, I'd stay. I think part of me has been operating with lingering doubts about that, and I've kind of feared committing to the move and then having things go wrong...but things have, essentially, only gotten more and more busy the longer I'm here. So, while I will always have strong ties to Logan, with family and many of my nearest and dearest friends there, I'm trying more and more to keep my eyes focused on where I am now, and where I'm going, and not so much on where I've been.
One of the reasons I have ties to Logan...well, Cache Valley, since she's not in Logan, is my mare, who's due to have another foal...well, basically, any day now. I could never afford to keep her down here...feed is more expensive, I'd have to pay pasture fees, and I'd have to carve yet another niche in my schedule to check up on her daily or else find someone I trusted to keep an eye on her for me. I can't imagine finding someone I trust more than Marla, who's taking care of Tot for me now...she and Ross are like another family to me, and even if there was no longer any Kidd family in the Logan area, I'd still feel like I had roots in the area. I'm hoping to have better luck with this foal than the last two...and I can only really consider it bad luck.
So...I'm another year older, though I don't feel it. My brother asked me if I felt like I was 40...most of the time, I still feel like I'm 25. There are days, though...there were a few times this winter when I was definitely feeling like I was getting older, but spending three hours a day (between the walks at my apartment complex and the walkways at work) will do that to you. I still credit feeling young to having a career that I love and working with people who also enjoy it as much as I do...I'm constantly discovering something new, learning a new trick or picking up a new skill or just getting to know a new performer that keeps me from getting caught up in the drudgery of doing the same thing, day after day. Apparently, this is translating well to my appearance...I have been working with Arika Shockmel on this show (she was the emcee), and she keeps telling me that I still look just the same as I did in college (even accused me of having my own Dorian Gray-style portrait stashed away somewhere...)
I keep meeting some truly unique and interesting people outside of work, too...I have to tell a story about one, in closing...after I'd finished the makeup work at the tech convention I talked about earlier, I had to meet someone about some costume work I was going to do for them. The theater they where they were rehearsing was only a few blocks from the venue where I'd been working...so I decided to walk, rather than having to deal with finding a parking place twice again that night. Along the way, I ran into a guy who gave me his hard-luck story...and while I'm not usually a soft touch for beggars, something about him rang true...I not only gave him some money, but ended up in a pretty lengthy discussion with him about life, faith, and dealing with the trials of life. The discussion ended with him unexpectedly saying a prayer aloud, and thanking God for meeting me...not for the money, but for the fact that I'd taken the time to talk...and to listen. And he asked that I be blessed that whatever I set my hand to would prosper. Regardless of your beliefs about God, it really struck home to me just how much we all need each other in this world, and about how little gestures we make can have such a huge impact for others. It was a very thought-provoking evening...
posted by Curtis at 12:36 AM
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